"So, you don't like the blue one?"

Why do jokes about guilt always involve Jewish mothers? I'm here to tell you that guilt is the prerogative, if not an imperative, of ALL mothers. Yes, even those who think they are raising their children to be independent, free thinkers. Instilling guilt is handed down as part of the family tradition. Our mothers learned it from their mothers who learned it from theirs, who learned...you get the idea. The mother of a Catholic friend would say to each child as they were heading out, "Remember you are a daughter of this household and a child of God." Guilt! My mother was a past master at instilling guilt: "I'm so disappointed in you. What will your father say?" But to her credit, she was quite oblivious to it. When I finally confronted her (in my twenties), she was genuinely remorseful. In fact, I felt awful about...oh, wait...more guilt! And I inherited it. Having no children to heap my inheritance on, I often choose friends (sorry!). And of course there is always my sister, who, at times, I'd like to feel guilt about not being close enough to share in parental caregiving (sorry, Sis). But really, the lesson is simple - only we can make ourselves feel guilty. So if you are ever one of the recipients of my largesse, simply smile, decline and walk away. Sure it will hurt but in time, I'll recover - no really, you don't need to worry about me. (See how easy it is? )

And now for the rest of the story: A mother gave her son two shirts, identical in all but color. One was green, one blue. He goes into his bedroom to try them on and comes out wearing the green one, and his mother says, "So..."

It's one of my favorite stories!